Honest

Honest

SOC Writing_ 1.3.21

 Honest

Honestly I desire you, admire you – want in – in with you, am in to you - have no fear of their consequences - their feelings that will rage and spite and hate me – I have taken the old money and fled, have ended up in another’s bed – have risked myself more times that one - to alight upon this, my freedom in saying the truth of my feelings - owning my desire and telling you straight - glorious to see me at home in my own desire and the articulation of this inner reality – unburdened once by you response. It is all unravelling, I am unravelling – in the honest truth of every piece of me, I find a depth of freedom – in risking desire I find freedom from entrapment and from the boggy mire that has kept me in my small silver cage for far too long – has me whistling too quiet a tune – when the noise - the roar of waterfalls is me – the growl of beasts is really closer to my truth – the smashing waves are my kin. There is quiet and still once the ravaging has taken place – once the beast has taken you from behind – a stillness - a still point where we have taken the world – where time dissolves to leave us wet and panting – the dryness gone – the desert rained upon and this resplendent growth now welling up in unknown before places – this – this graces – the multitude of his faces and the embraces of the many – the one and the all – singularity and omega - everything is coming home to its magnetic base – all the far flung pieces are being called home and you my beacon of light - delight have parcelled these treasure into edible bites – packages of food for my soul – the very thing I never knew I needed and then you bled – finding myself completely still and ever present.

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Snake