Love maker

SOC Writing _ 5.7.21

Love maker

I am a love maker, love taker – supreme god of a world of cotton sanfras and wild ocean settings – above clay and upon the sticky ground of a natural world - peering up through Pohutukawa as love soars above me – the wild reckless and feckless nature of this love – eyes wide open and the car tearing around corners just before the fire lit – re kindled – why am I grieving a lost love while in the midst of great love? The dove is brought, sold, bought – never free so Cohen says – I am wanting freedom at all turns – despite this animal ferocity that says you’re mine – all to myself – I still long for experience – for the free uncluttered love that has me soaring – able to own my own desires and yet not all of me – the child in me like my youngest son – full of testosterone and might – there is still heart in me – the fears to face – the willing embrace of a much larger love I am yet to know – as I consider the love of he with you and lean into once again fear – fear of the unknown – a temple space of heart eaters as flesh and body come together on the Highden floor boards – I am unsure of myself – how will my animal want? What will I desire and yet fear – be alone and broken – or open to a much greater part of me – my instinct that I can always trust – this body of bodies deep inside me wants to be more – to explore – to have the floor and wants more – in tangible tastes – and the overall embrace of you has me pulled through a narrow gate where shoes off and bare footed I must walk with care, with abandon and with this ever arriving love – love of all - love with all – love in all – a cosmic underpinning of what causes goodness to arrive – and I give myself away, to you – to all – there love arises - whether a small kindness - kindness – I am for all – my love available for you my Perth bound friend – even as it seems I am only for one – there again – the door of my heart swings on squeaky hinges and still has room to move – still room for you.