Firelight

SOC Writing _ 16.10.21

Firelight

A warm and sharpening presence fills this room - my gait changes as the woman approaches, fills my glass and asks me how dinner was. I am not paying attention - because - I am waiting for you, my dear - to come from your caravan cocoon - to come from far away back to this leather fireside creature who wishes only to snuggle you and listen to your stories - hear you unpack all your suitcases of life - with their various precious contents - spilling out into my verdant life - wishing to see all of you in season - out of season - where the crow flies we will too - where the bird lands, we too will take our share of the seed scattered - the field planted and our home beginning to rise from the ashes of this dark occasion - the occasion of our separation - to be separate selves we get to know the feeling of our bodies - what we want deep down - what cannot be glossed over or forgotten - and then - after a while come out from the cavern into the bright sun light - lit from within with a fire that will never go out. I turn to you thing morning, really remember you - your smile that makes my heart crack - your searching eyes that find me completely here for you - completely at home in myself - yet making space - room for you to breathe and more - to dance - to anguish - to live wildly and brightly - freely and lovingly as you do. In this, I take your hand, kiss you tenderly like there has never been a moment and may never again be a time where I get to un - level myself in service of loving you - in complete adoration of the life force standing in front of me - weeping wreck that I am - a happily crumbling man - bits of dirt on the floor as the cracks in my earth appear and grow as they desire - flowers for you, in the death of me.